It's mid July now. The summer has gone well. thus far.. I've been exercising nearly daily, dancing more (including pole), and crafting more... a lot more. I made a box for my essential oils and a jewelry tree...which I'm as pleased as punch about it. :-) And this weekend is the woman's workshop in Ojai! So all in all...it's a good summer. Am I happy?.... Meh. It comes and goes. Up and down. Overall, no.... But things are still shifting. Dust is still *everywhere*. At least I'm moving. I'm literally moving my body..and figuratively moving forward in my projects. It'll get better. I'm starting to get that "something's coming" sense again. It's faint....and maybe it's just the hope that it's there...but I'm pretty sure it is. And of course, time will tell. Last time I had this, a few months later, I met Scott. So we'll see where this one takes me. For now... I'll just keep moving. Keep dancing. Keep exercising. Keep my body moving. Things are bound to shake off if you wiggle for long enough.
And on a totally different note...
There are grass spiders all over the place, now. It's because I don't kill them. :-) I let them run around and they just keep getting bigger and bigger (at least the ones that survive and aren't eaten by Zoe). Jess was cleaning the bathroom the other day and makes a sound. I come in and there's a huge grass spider by the toilet. I felt this wave of calm come over me, and I bent down and put my left hand on the floor...and used my right hand to guild her onto me. She walked up onto my hand very calmly, and slowly crawled up my arm as I took her outside. It was really a fantastic feeling. I remember when I use to be terrified of these... they are FAST and "meaty" looking (though not as meaty as wolf spiders). It's wonderful to have so much compassion and love for them now. They are beautiful creatures, and so misunderstood.
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